My heart is not a vacation

 

You treat humans like islands, 

hopping from one to the next 

You stay on the islands until

you feel that the honeymoon phase is over

and you feel that you have soaked in every last drop of sunlight

and at the first crack of thunder, 

you prepare your ship for an early departure

to the next island

 

You live in an island state

forgetting that there are other cities to visit inland

that are just as beautiful as the island that invites tourists in

but you are so focused on the sun that you never saw

the spot to safely anchor your ship to explore the rest of the island. 

 

But I am not an island you can easily escape from 

I am not a vacation you will find yourself 

quickly exiting

If you think that you can walk onto this island, 

without a rescue plan, 

because you have been saved by god so many times before

then you have arrived with too high of expectations. 

 

When lightning strikes

and the winds become unbearably strong, 

you will not be able to set sail because the 

tropical storm will follow immediately after

and you will be lost at sea. 

 

This island will always haunt you because once you tear yourself apart from it,

beaten, bruised, burnt, but so alive, 

you will realize that there are no other islands quite 

as welcoming as this one. 

You will find yourself attempting to dock your ship 

again and again and again at the harbor, 

only to find that there is not longer space left on the bank. 

 

And when you spend the rest of your days, searching other islands, 

attempting to find the same fascination in overcrowded, showy, tourist-ridden islands, 

you will find that i was not a vacation.

I am a destination

 

This piece has been published on Thought Catalog. You can view the published version here

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